Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Warm n Toasty



A most apropos title non? After all the weather is quite lame and staying warm is at a premium. But let me first go off topic and then coyly attempt, and fail miserably, to tie things together. 

This weekend Steph and I threw down a wicked Sunday brunch consisting of food items masquerading as other food items. And yes, on the surface that has precious little to do with a fucking "SPICY" blog.  Are you so quick to judge my intentions? Tsk Tsk! For I have a story to tell. Like I said, this weekend, brunch, food was served. One of the most creative submissions was done by our buddy Guapo. He made Nachos, or so you think. They totally looked like delicious, yum-tastic Nachos, but of course in staying true to the theme he had made the most sickeningly sweet, cavity inducing chaos on a platter. The chips actually were homemade tortilla chips dredged in cinnamon and sugar. Like black beans on your Nachos? How about mini chocolate chips instead. Salsa you say? Try candied cherries in shades of red, green and white simmering in a fructose ooze instead. I think by now you've probably been able to eliminate cheese as part of the offering on your own so thankfully I can cease with the infomercial style ingredient introductions. In lieu of cheese he shaved a fresh mango to give it an otherworldly cheese-tastic appearance. And lastly since he is an avid fan of sour cream's existence he had to add that as well, rather he added Dulce de Leche as it's stand in. So far this dish looked amazing but taste wise it was bordering on the hinterlands of ridiculous. It was that sweet.  
Ok, ok so make with the Hot, Hot, Hot already. Guapo knew that this would be a challenge to anyone with a functioning palette to handle so he hatched a plan to cut the sweetness with a little spice and that's where my new friend Jalapeno Jelly comes in. What an amazing idea, mixing jalapenos with gelatin and sugar topped off with a little leprechaun green food grade dye for good measure. So he mixed it in and oddly enough it worked. It worked so well that he had to mix Steph her own bowl, sans Jalapeno Jelly because she felt it was indeed "a little bit spicy." Noted. Regardless of this fact the Nachos were more for show and less for eating. But, he did do a bang up job with them. What's more is that he left me the jar of Jalapeno jelly, for research purposes. One fine day I will try this stuff on a nice piece of toast. As to whether or not I actually get past the first bite that's neither here nor there. 

The Spice must flow....................Just not from our arses.

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