Wednesday, September 24, 2008


Last night when conjuring up an idea of how to blow $50 on ingredients for one meal at Whole Foods (Soon to be released in paperback) I had no real direction in mind. All I knew was that whatever I made had to incorporate the eggplant that was residing in our fridge at the moment. So, I searched through my cookbooks, and just kept coming up with eggplant Parmesan. Boring! Anyway, we happened to be watching Bizarre Foods at the time and we overheard Andrew Zimmer drop a wicked fresh quote: "Uhh, I need to wash that down with some Vindaloo!" So off I went to Whole Foods with Vindaloo on the brain. The only thing is Vindaloo is usually pretty spicy, which will not fly for Steph and her gutty-wots. The task was simple, in theory, how do I make Vindaloo and make it mild? Hmmm, well we did have about 3 cartons of heavy whipping cream in our fridge and as any spicy fan knows it's dairy that takes the edge off the burn (MR. T says: "don't drink that water FOOL!"). So I made the bastard love child between a curry and a vindaloo. Did I successfully complete my challenge?

Me: "Is it too spicy?"

Steph: "Not in my mouth, but my throat is burning! I get milk!"

Failed. But I did manage to sneak the eggplant in, much to the chagrin of any seasoned Indian chef.

The moral of this tale is that I should never plan a menu while watching either Andrew Zimmer or Anthony Bourdain because I start to salivate watching them eat all that delicious street food in crazy countries I want to visit.

(The Vindaloo pictured above is not mine, but it looks tasty enough to post)

The Spice must flow....................Just not from our arses.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

My new Fav Chips and Salsa combo. Holy Fuck are these good!

So there I am at Bi-Rite in the Mission when I discover these chips that look thick, golden and laden with salt like little pack mules in a salt mine. Don't get me started about the oily sheen, because they have that too.  These chips are by a company out of Sonoma called Primavera that seems to pride themselves on small batches using fresh ingredients. They also seem to pride themselves on the fact this little bag of bitch ass chips cost me 6 bucks. I am p-whipped on gourmet foods, and even though these chips would cheat on me the first chance they get and then ask to borrow money from me even though I know I'm a sucker for doing it, but I do it because they are FUCKING DELICIOUS CHIPS!!!!! Um, let's move onto the salsa. This stuff is dynamite, liquid dynamite and some surly drunken gold miner guy has just pushed that old-timey plunger thing and the salsa just went Kaboom with flavor all over my walls and even the ceiling which is going to be a horrible bitch to clean up but it's so worth it because this salsa is also FUCKING AWESOME!!!!!! It's not super hot, suitable for the Spice Cadet in your life.  Anyway the next time you feel like spending 11 bucks on chips and salsa, which would buy a controlling share in a taco joint just outside of Tijuana, this is the chips and salsa to spend it on.

The Spice must flow....................Just not from our arses.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Tom Kha in the Can! Bitches

I felt that leading off with the term "Bitches" was a good way of letting everyone know, in a modern parlance, that we mean business about our spices.

On to the post, and a brief one it is. But, it is a relevant post.

I made the Tom Kha pictured below for Steph the other night and she confirmed "it's a little spicy." We had the following exchange just to put it into context:

Me: "How is it?"

Steph: "It's a little spicy."

Soon after this I discovered the reason for the apparent spiciness. The fire engine red thermo nuclear Thai chili that comes in each can. Hoo-Raay!!! (Or is it Hu-Raay?)

The Spice must flow....................Just not from our arses.