Monday, July 18, 2011

Calabrian Bastard!

Where the hell has this little fucking beautiful jar of rouge-y love butter been hiding? Not in my pantry that's for damn sure! Lucca, in the Mission and one fine Italian market I might add, seems to have been hoarding this gem. This little paste from Calabria Italy is amazing, stunning really. It's made from that delicious and spicy little number, the aptly named Calabrian chili. Imagine that. it's reminiscent of Harissa sauce. Those crazy Moors! It's bright, fire engine-like all up in your face red color makes it All the more appetizing. Lucca has jars of whole Calabrian peppers in oil. AKA, my next purchase.

Wherever you go, there you are

Monday, June 27, 2011

WTF, Seriously?

Has it really just been just shy of a year since I last told a tale of the spice? Whatever, fuck it, I've been busy yo! Anyway, I have a small update and it's called awesome! Seriously, I found this jar of green peppercorns and I am loving them. Although they are not "hot" in the classic sense of the word they are too much for my lady's delicate taste buds. So that's saying something I suppose. These little green nubbins will add some nice flavor to pretty much whatever you're making. The Spice must flow....................Just not from our arses.

Monday, July 5, 2010

Killing you with spice!

There is nothing more American than eating on the 4th of July and by that rational there is nothing that screams 4th of July like Chinese food- twice. Steph and I started our day with a little Dim Sum (nothing spicy to report) in lieu of hot dogs and flammable materials. It was only when I was asked to go to the Old Mandarin Islamic restaurant by Steph's dad and his buddy for some dudes only spicy food eating. How could I pass that shit up? The main reason I was brought here was to try a dish whose Chinese name I've just forgotten even though I didn't think I would, which roughly translates to "killing you with spice" which sounds pretty sweet to me. The dish consists of minced chicken and about five kabillion different varieties of chilies sauteed in chili oil. Yeah, it fucking ruled! Anyway, what makes this even more awesome is that this isn't even an authentic Chinese nor Muslim dish. Instead it's a concoction thought up by the gregarious owner. Way to go my friend. You're advancing the spicy cause. Oh and did I mention that the smallish dining room was full so we were led through the kitchen and out the back door through a storage shed and into a room with two tables and a boat load of nautical accouterment. As we are currently working on ideas for the decor of our new house I will have to float this nautical idea past Steph to see if we can make this happen. I'm hoping you caught all the maritime references in those last few lines because I laid them on rather think.

The Spice must flow....................Just not from our arses.

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Brick Lane Curry House in NYC can suck it!

Ok, admittedly this post is well past due. In fact it's so completely irrelevant at this point that I shouldn't even bother. But I feel compelled to unburden myself about this place. Brick Lane is an unassuming Indian restaurant located on tree lined East Village street that's teeming with Indian Restaurants. The reason their fifteen minutes have been counting down as of late is solely attributable to it's curry which is reputed to be the hottest in the world, or some shit like that. If you've watch shows like Man vs. Food and you've seen the Brick Lane episode, you've no doubt seen cooks wearing respirators and goggles looking like their about to give someone a Silkwood shower. Did I just drop an obscure film reference in your lap? Yes I did and I fucking nailed it. Anyway, the curry is called Phaal and there's even a touch of side show gamesmanship involved in the ordering process. Those ordering Phaal must verbally consent to the fact that it's "hot" and you know it can make your mouth feel mol-tanic. If you can actually eat an order of Phaal you get a beer on the house. I went in expecting to have an epic experience worthy of a small one act play. A play about a man and his curry and the human condition. Instead upon ordering the dish that I had traveled 3000 miles just to try the waiter came very close to crumpling up his apron and walking off the job right then and there. "Ugh, oh no not the Phaal" he said dejectedly. He kept trying to steer me away from the Phaal and when I held firm, resolute in my convictions "no sir, I believe I will have- the Phaal" he simply had had enough. I never was asked to assume any and all responsibilities for making the attempt. Clearly my advanced case of "tourism" had ruined his night. No matter what happened, I would not be receiving my free beer. His assertion was that with the curry being so spicy it's just not possible to really taste the food. To me if that's the case then why have it on the menu in the first place? Once I actually tried the curry I instantly became depressed. Don 't get me wrong it wasn't bad, it's just that it wasn't that hot. The Nan was rad but seriously the Phaal was, wait for it, a fail. I actually wasn;t able to finish the dish but not because of the scoville rating but rather because I don't have the wear with all to eat a ton of food at once. I buckled under the pressure. Oh yeah did I mention that Phaal costs about $18? Yeah, no shit it's way pricy, even by New York standards. I think all the fame has gone to their heads. They can Phaalk off! Oh man, I am killing it with the curry puns.

The Spice must flow....................Just not from our arses.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Lack of Spice in mah life.

Right now I'd have to say I'm in a bit of a spice slump. I haven't had an epic spicy experience of note lately. I mean the kind of experience like in "Spies Like Us" where they test their resilience to extremes of temperature by taking on a flame thrower. Yeah, like that. I've lacked that in my life lately and it's utterly depressing me. some nights I can't sleep, some days I won't eat. I've resorted to huffing jars of expired salsa in the back of grocery stores to get my fix. I have no shame. But, things are looking up. Ever since an episode of Man vs. Food visited a humble curry shop in NYC called the Brick Lane Curry House I've been dying to give it a go. Brick lane serves a curry they claim is the hottest anywhere on the Earth and possibly Jupiter. They call this concoction Phaal, which they list on their menu as "An excruciatingly hot curry, more pain and sweat than flavor, for our customers who do this on a dare, we will require you to state a verbal disclaimer not holding us liable for any physical or emotional damage after eating this curry. If you do manage to finish your serving of curry, a bottle of beer is on us." Did you catch that last part? Free Beer! Anyway, the story goes that the chefs who prepare Phaal have to wear filtered masks over their faces which makes them look like they're about to go out and bomb a buffed out subway train. Now that's multitasking.

So as luck would have it Twinkie Chan and I are off to NYC in a couple of weeks. So I guess my luck is beginning to change. It's like a veritable change of seasons inside my head. I have a purpose once again. It is my destiny to meet and destroy the Phaal at Brick Lane Curry House. My only issue with this challenge is that bowl of curry looks like it was built for two. I am not normally considered "he of the big appetite," so finding room for it in my hamster sized stomach may be an issue. But, I shall endeavor to try. Free beer is on the line.

The Spice must flow....................Just not from our arses.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Curry for Sure-y? OMG that's a bad pun.

Ok, I said in my last post how I don't necessarily dig on reposting other peeps stuff. Nut, I'm making an exception yet again. Last Saturday we went to a Japanese curry spot in Los Altos and it is ridiculously delicious. The curry is divine and very much scratch made. Anyway, Steph just dropped a pretty sweet post about our experience and she sums it up beautifully. She doesn't say "fuck" as much as I would, but hey that's just me. I didn't feel that I needed to essentially duplicate her post, using the same pictures etc. so I just copied it instead. Besides I'm busy making Kale chips (not spicy) and watching Dr. Who right now. Enjoy her post-y post.

The Spice must flow....................Just not from our arses.

Monday, March 15, 2010

Oh, Repost!!!!

Ok, I'll start this by saying that re-posting other peoples entries, especially when they are from a weekly entertainment and arts rag, The SF Weekly to be more specific, is not my usual M.O. but I thought this article was pretty cool so I'll just go ahead and re-post it.

"Free Food!
Finish the Korean Suicide Burrito at John's and You Don't Have to Pay

To celebrate the one-year anniversary of the creation of the Korean burrito, John Park, owner of John's Snack and Deli in the Financial District, is calling for Scoville junkies to take his Suicide Kimchi Burrito Challenge, starting tomorrow (March 16).

He's taking his regular burritos (kimchi fried rice, kimchi, marinated meats, salsa, cheese, and cilantro) and adding what he described to me last week as an "atomic" blend of Chinese, Mexican, and Korean peppers. If you can finish the burrito in the store, you won't have to pay for it, and he'll post a photo of your sweaty, scorched-lip smile. (If you punk out, it'll only cost you $6.84.)

Working in your favor, there appear to be no rules against drinking milk or beer while you eat, and Park noted on his Web site that he's currently serving veggie rice porridge for $2.50, the culinary equivalent of running out of a sauna to jump in the cold plunge.

John's Snack & Deli 40 Battery (at Pine), 434-4634"

Ok, so the article may not have been written by me, because if it was it would have been much more entertaining and probably a little more biased and opinionated and very much less objective and finally I would have said, fuck somewhere in the article. But, I do have something that the writer does not and that is - proximity to John's Deli. It's right outside my office window. Thus I just took a lo-fi pic to share with you the splendor that is Battery St.

Also, I will totally take John up on his challenge. He's only working with Jalapenos and Sriracha down there.

There you have it. Not much Artsy stuff to say about it anyway. It just is.

The Spice must flow....................Just not from our arses.